time off on friday

being so stress lately.. so decided to leave all d things behind n bring nadira 2 manikar beach resort while hubby's @ kk..



nadira was totally excited as dis is her 1st vacation (mini vacation i guess - 2 days 1 nite)

we arrived @ d resort @ 2.40pm while hubb's flight from kk arrived @ 3.10pm. @ 1st he was so angry wit me, but dis what is what i shud hav after a long stressfull months..



d beach n pool view from our room;))

n about 3.30pm hubby arrived n started 2 'pujuk' me back.. haha..
then after resting in d room, we had our late lunch @ d restaurant..



nadira's playing @ d playground while waiting 4 d food 2 b served..



after lunch, happy;))

after dat we went 2 d pool.. it was nadira's 1st.. she was so scared @ 1st. but then excitedly playing wit d water;))






then, we stayed @ d room resting all nite long..

d nex morning, woke up early as usual then getting ready 4 d complimentary bfast..



hubby n nadira still @ bed while i'm getting ready..



our bfast..



then, i went to d spa 4 facial.. d service was average but d price quite expensive than normal, i guess since it was located @ a resort.. service 3-star n d spa is 2-star..



me after d facial n massage(just d face, hands n shoulder).. a little fresh.. d beautician said my skin was having no problem but only few whiteheads.. she said as clean as baby skin.. haha.. thank God i was pregnant, if not.. my face will b fulled of whiteheads ;p






later, made a walk @ d pool side n beach.. then packed our stuff b4 going home.. ;))

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us..

again.. stress came into my life.. hubby left us @ lbuan 4 1 nite juz to attend his fren's wedding @ kk. he asked me last nite, n i was.. speechless.. actually what is in his mind? i barely knew him now.. i keep on telling myself thing's getting harder.. 4 me n nadira, n d worst me.. leaving us juz 2 meet his friend. i dun felt he's makes us his priority now, n since d 'matter' happened..

i'd hardly taking care of myself now.. n yesterday @ school i was hardly breathed.. d doc said my tummy need 2 relax esp after eating. juz dunno what will happen 2 d little 1.. still worried 4 nadira 4 her bronchiolitis n her hateness 4 going @ d nanny's hse..

hardly 2 pay attention rite now.. lots of work need 2 b done @ school.. but seems my thoughts r not into it.. worried what will happen 2 me n nadira in d future:(

what actually a man 1 in his life? mayb we'r juz dun meant 2 b any longer.. juz pray 4 d best..

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eidul adha emergency

@ 1st planned 2 spend time wit hubby during d festive. though he's working on dat day. but after nadira's sickness ( more than a week coughing, sometimes throwing up @ nite bcoz of her cough ), me n nadira had 2 go back 2 kk 2 meet d specialist. i've called 4 an appointment with dr liaw, smc. but he's only available on tuesday ( sunday - eidul adha n monday - public holiday ). did thought 4 seeing dr chan ( damai ), dr soon ( luyang ) or dr june ( lintas jaya ), but hubby insist to hav dr liaw 4 nadira.

eidul adha morning, arrived @ kk. then went 2 kg papas, to meet my mom's big family.

n yesterday, me n nadira went 2 shopping @ parkson, wawasan plaza. actually i'm planning 2 get a blouse, hijjab n sandalls 4 d school's dinner on d 16th. n get nadira a new bottle, wet tissue n mayb a garment. but finally..



bought nadira a pair of crocs shoes.. @ 1st, made her tried a brown-pink shoes, but they r thight.. nadira cried when i put them down.. then i had her dis 1, though a slightly bigger, she was so xcited walking in it..


got myself a pair of crocs too.. ;))


nadira also had a mickey mouse club 3d dining set..

so, will wear anything 4 d dinner. mayb our raya attire. yup, i'm bringing nadira n also my cousin, farah, 2 d dinner. hubby's not available coz working dat nite. can't wait to ebd d school term.. 1 2 stay @ kk, hav appointment with dr felice ( my previous G&O ).. really worried 4 my baby since i'm not taking care myself well dis time.. then, will do a lot of shopping 4 her ;)) d doc @ membedai clinic said mayb it's a girl.. so juz wait til my 4d scan, mayb will do it @ labuan.. y not @ kk? coz we'r juz leaving labuan 4 d school holiday on d 25th. hubby's going with us, since his bridegroom on our weddibg day, is getting married on d 26th @ kota marudu.. i'm xcited 4 d journey coz it'll b 1st time going there;))

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Location:Jalan Kolam,Kota Kinabalu,Malaysia

happy birthday hubby!

it's hubby's birthday 2day! luv him so much.. he's now 30yrs.. n we'd shared almost 3yrs of marriage n 7 yrs of luv.. start dating in 2004.. hehe.. hopefully we'll share more happy n sad times, ups n downs n exciting life 2gether with our lil' angels;))

will always pray d best for him.. wishing dat he'll keep on being my best friend, my soulmate n my lover.. can't imagine life without him, i mean.. if i was married 2 1 of my exes'.. haha.. no no no..

it's has been a rough october.. with problems here n there, nadira's n my sickness, but still.. we manage 2 handle them.. i was being totally sensitive during dis pregnancy.. n we'r going 2 do our best esp 4 ur kids..

hopefully we can reach our 20, 50 or uncountable yrs of marriage. amin ;))

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24 hrs

funny.. he said why he should see us 4 24 hrs.. he got work to do, yes dat's 12 hrs already. so d nex 12 1? meaning.. he 1 2 do his hobby in d other 12 hrs.. haha.. dat's rite.. so dis making me so stress.. 1st d other problem, now dis problem.. so conclusion.. u didn't hav 2 c us 4 nex yr.. dat'll b a good conclusion.. no 'us' anymore.. juz u.. pls la.. u rather spend time wit ppl u barely know, in online.. than ur family..

hobby u shud do when u'r free.. not everyday, everytime, most of d time.. i'm not understanding? juz let me go, then u'll get full time with ur hobby.

i'm really sad.. my sleeps is hardly with him, either he's working or he's with his hobby.. as i said b4, near but actually far..

is bad talking 'bout ur marriage prob.. but i juz can't take it anymore..

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emotional break down

something happened dis week, something dat affect my marriage. still thanked to Allah 4 testing me. however, i was always sad tru' dis week. i can forgive but it's hard 2 forget..

mayb both of us doing mistake, n dat's y it happened.. n my pregnancy making me super sensitive.. thinking i can't b a good wife, a good mama..

nadira's also not being good dis month. she didn't like d new nanny, but dat's d only choice i had now. n she's having bad cough tru' week..

i really need a great support now.. sometimes hubby's there n sometimes not.. mayb he cared, but no action taken. dat makes me sad. mayb he taught i'm able 2 face it alone..

also getting emotionally weaker day by day.. try to stand but keep on thinking negatively 4 what will happen in d future.. as i'm 5 months pregnant now.. afraid dat d baby will makes things harder. harder 4 me 2 b a good mom n wife. some ppl easily done it, but 4 me it's getting stressful sometimes.

no news 'bout d new home.. as i'm excited 2 start d furniture hunting.. really wish we can move by dis yr.. d hse we'r staying now is really uncomfortable.. hardly 2 get d fresh air, hardly drying d laundry, dust keep on entering d hse, d bad air-cond.. i'm not fussy, but i really dun like d environment..

n getting headache when thinking 4 d nanny next yr as i'm having 2 children dat time. surely d cleaning, d parenting r getting harder. financial? hopefully ok since d government is raising their servant salary..alhamdulillah, at lis 1 problem solve..

hopefully my next entry will b a happy 1.. i really miz'd being d old me.. not stressful as now..

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all my instinct r rite..

pray d best 4 me.. being tested.. n i hope Allah will lead me d way;'((


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