happy birthday hubby!

it's hubby's birthday 2day! luv him so much.. he's now 30yrs.. n we'd shared almost 3yrs of marriage n 7 yrs of luv.. start dating in 2004.. hehe.. hopefully we'll share more happy n sad times, ups n downs n exciting life 2gether with our lil' angels;))

will always pray d best for him.. wishing dat he'll keep on being my best friend, my soulmate n my lover.. can't imagine life without him, i mean.. if i was married 2 1 of my exes'.. haha.. no no no..

it's has been a rough october.. with problems here n there, nadira's n my sickness, but still.. we manage 2 handle them.. i was being totally sensitive during dis pregnancy.. n we'r going 2 do our best esp 4 ur kids..

hopefully we can reach our 20, 50 or uncountable yrs of marriage. amin ;))

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

24 hrs

funny.. he said why he should see us 4 24 hrs.. he got work to do, yes dat's 12 hrs already. so d nex 12 1? meaning.. he 1 2 do his hobby in d other 12 hrs.. haha.. dat's rite.. so dis making me so stress.. 1st d other problem, now dis problem.. so conclusion.. u didn't hav 2 c us 4 nex yr.. dat'll b a good conclusion.. no 'us' anymore.. juz u.. pls la.. u rather spend time wit ppl u barely know, in online.. than ur family..

hobby u shud do when u'r free.. not everyday, everytime, most of d time.. i'm not understanding? juz let me go, then u'll get full time with ur hobby.

i'm really sad.. my sleeps is hardly with him, either he's working or he's with his hobby.. as i said b4, near but actually far..

is bad talking 'bout ur marriage prob.. but i juz can't take it anymore..

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

emotional break down

something happened dis week, something dat affect my marriage. still thanked to Allah 4 testing me. however, i was always sad tru' dis week. i can forgive but it's hard 2 forget..

mayb both of us doing mistake, n dat's y it happened.. n my pregnancy making me super sensitive.. thinking i can't b a good wife, a good mama..

nadira's also not being good dis month. she didn't like d new nanny, but dat's d only choice i had now. n she's having bad cough tru' week..

i really need a great support now.. sometimes hubby's there n sometimes not.. mayb he cared, but no action taken. dat makes me sad. mayb he taught i'm able 2 face it alone..

also getting emotionally weaker day by day.. try to stand but keep on thinking negatively 4 what will happen in d future.. as i'm 5 months pregnant now.. afraid dat d baby will makes things harder. harder 4 me 2 b a good mom n wife. some ppl easily done it, but 4 me it's getting stressful sometimes.

no news 'bout d new home.. as i'm excited 2 start d furniture hunting.. really wish we can move by dis yr.. d hse we'r staying now is really uncomfortable.. hardly 2 get d fresh air, hardly drying d laundry, dust keep on entering d hse, d bad air-cond.. i'm not fussy, but i really dun like d environment..

n getting headache when thinking 4 d nanny next yr as i'm having 2 children dat time. surely d cleaning, d parenting r getting harder. financial? hopefully ok since d government is raising their servant salary..alhamdulillah, at lis 1 problem solve..

hopefully my next entry will b a happy 1.. i really miz'd being d old me.. not stressful as now..

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

all my instinct r rite..

pray d best 4 me.. being tested.. n i hope Allah will lead me d way;'((


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

shopping therapy;)

hubby's working during d weekend. so i'm having shopping therapy @ kk ;))

yesterday arrived @ kk about 6pm, as we'r leaving labuan @ 2pm. lots of waiting n plus d long journey of menumbok-kk.. also went 2 buy nadira's diapers, milk n scott's emulsion @ tg aru.. got 2 make her take it since she's being sick lately..

n 2day.. done lots of shopping;))
in d morning, my dad drove us to buy nadira's potty n 2-pcs set garments @ mothercare, kk times sq.. nadira's wet tissues n teats @ signature, karamunsing..

then in d evening, wit my cuzie, we bought nadira's trunki bag, baby cream, dora panties n my stretch mark cream @ little me, 1-borneo mall.. haha.. n finally hav a snack with cuzie, linda @ sushi king @ 1-b..

my catch of d day..



nadira's potty.. actually 1 2 buy a pink 1.. but finally decide on dis, so dat nadira's soon-2-b-sibling also can use it.



got nadira 2 sleeveless garments, as labuab was so hot dis days..



finally got dis 4 nadira.. no stock 4 d pink 1.. so juz bought d yellow bee trunki, @ least, if nadira got a 'lil bro, he can use it later;)



kind of trying dis buds' brand.. stretch mark cream 4 me n baby cream 4 nadira.. she got a very sensitive skin.. d mothercare lotion was not 100% suits her.. sometimes her fingers n toes get dry..

now thinking what should i prepare 1st.. home furnitures or d baby's list items.. still didn't d house key yet.. then, still no idea 'bout d baby's gender.. so both had 2 b postponed 1st.. hmm..

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Location:kk, sabah

october rain..

it's been almost my 21st wks 4 my 2nd pregnancy;).. went to d clinic last friday, but d doc said still can't c his gender..

nothing much happen in my life.. still felt tired day by day..

got d chance going 2 d beach last week ( after 'merajuk' with hubby since we've been staying @ home during d weekend ). it was nadira's 2nd time n now she was afraid 2 d water.. huhu.. last time, she was d 1 who's eager n excited playing with d water..



then hubby bought durian 4 me on our way back home. @ 1st he thought 1 durian is 4 rm30 ( it wrote 30 @ d label - which actually 3.0 meaning for its 3.0kg weight ).. he bought 2 durian n had 2 pay rm140 4 them.. huhu..



really satiesfied with d thick n sweet durian;))

n juz dis friday, my school had organized a premier camp 4 uniform unit.. 100 pupils involved which i was assigned 2 b 1 of d facilitator. i got d chance 2 try out d paintball, n it was my 1st;p















i'd miz'd all d target.. haha..

n 2day started 2 feel it again.. stress.. after being so tired 4 d camp, which end dis afternoon, d pressure came again.. wit nadira's attitude, hubby's.. really made my day.. money wasn't d problem now, but he's attitude making me stressful. he keeps blaming me if i get angry wit nadira. coz sometimes i shout n hit her a bit.. whenever i try 2 slow talk saying 'no' to her, most of d time she'll get 'merajuk ', started 2 throw things, kicking, hitting anything in her way.. hmm.. sometimes i dunno what i'd 2 do.. i really need a good supporter.. or shud i call a soulmate.. living near, but my heart wasn't near, it has been far away, as dis is d 2nd time i'm thinking 2 call it off.. but i guess need 2 wait 4 d 2nd baby 1st..

seriously i've keeping all dis long since me n nadira came 2 lbuan.. living here really makes me stress.. there's no prob @ work.. but my social life bcame worse, i'd prefer 2 b a quiet person.. but home sucks.. really uncomfortable ( 'rumah bujang' n only basic things in here ). n him.. still with his own life, his 'online game'.

really hope things will b better after we move into our new home.. i really miz'd d 'happy' me..

-Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Location:labuan f.t.

alana nadira's 2nd birthday

late post of coz.. hehe.. but never too late.. during her 2nd bday, which suppose on d 23rd of sept, we didn't managed to celebrate it like last yr. well, no time to plan n rush 4 d journey from labuan to kk. so, juz bought nadira a cake n a present .. n celebrate it on d 24th..

though it was simple... but we'r so happy since nadira was turning 2.. n she'll b a big sis soon ;)) here r some pics during d simple celebration..

b4.. she's crying coz need more sleep after long day shopping n visiting her atok's house (alan's dad)
oreo ice cream cake (with belgium choc n vanilla cookie ice cream filling).. so yummy!!!
from mama n abah.. barbie's b-bright learning laptop;))








excited playing wit her new 'lappy' ;P